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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Special thank you..

To Holly at Caring for Carleigh for writing Jasper's name on a beautiful fall leaf.

I would also like to say sorry for being such an awful blogger and commenter. I am reading all of your blogs that I follow. I have been in such funk. My depression is back ten fold and am actually considering going on medication again. I'm going to wait until January to try see if I can get through thim myself and if not then everything goes on hold until I can "heal". I quoted the word heal because I'm not sure if anyone can ever trully heal from something like loosing a child.

I don't even know why I bother to get my hopes up each cycle. I thought for sure we timed it just right, but nope stupid witch showed up. I guess deep down inside I hoped everyone that told me that once you get pg it will be easier the next time where actually right for a change. Damn stupid infertility, YOU SUCK!


  1. I am so sorry you are feeling so terrible. I've been trying to get out of one of my "funks" here lately too. It really stinks to be able to literally see yourself sinking deeper and deeper into a hole and not be able to do a darn thing about it! If there is anything I can do for you I am here...even if it's just an ear :)

  2. You're so welcome! :)

    I thought everything was timed great for us too, but nope. :( It sucks so bad.

  3. Oh Lisa, I wish I could take all the pain away and make it all easier for you.

    many peaceful *hugs* from me to you!

  4. I think infertility just compounds the loss you (we) already experience. Every month that doesn't bring a new life causes you to mourn the death of your little one even more. I pray God blesses you with a healthy pregnancy very soon. *hugs*

  5. I'm sorry, but I'm LMAO at your "stupid witch showed up" comment. :) I know the twisting, hilly roads of infertility well. They aren't easy to travel, and the end is never in sight. Wishing you more luck, and hopefully some peace.