Waterfall Angels on Facebook

Our rainbow Samuel Thomas Goldthorpe

Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Not ready

I thought I was ready for this year to be over, but the truth is I'm more afraid of next year. I don't want it to be March again. I don't want it to be a year since I met Jasper and had to give him up. I don't want to spend this new year or any without my son. I'm forced to and I hate that more then anything in this world.


  1. I just posted my thoughts on this very topic. In a month, it will be a year since we had our boys. I don't want it to be a year already.

    Thinking of you dear friend and your sweet Jasper! *hugs*

  2. Thinking of you and remembering that feeling- of not wanting time to past- of wanting to hold onto my grief because letting go- even a little- felt like I was letting go of him! Hold your memories- keep writing and know that you will never fully let go- never! It's been six years for me- and each day now I look at it as one day closer to seeing him again in heaven! Wishing you peace in 2010!

  3. While I have hope for this new year I am also afraid. I need this year to give us a better outcome.