I keep forgetting that this blog is also for my tireless journey through Infertility and hopes for a living Rainbow baby.
*Disclaimer I will be using harsh language*
I'm so sick and fucking tired of OPK's. I really don't even know why I continue to use them. I'm currently on cd 20 and the fucking ovulation test will be almost pos one day, then fucking full fledge negative the next. I mean come on I know I have fucked up cycles, but this is getting ridiculous. This was never like this before Jasper. They would gradually get darker until it was postitve. I hope this in not some start to a new fucking problem, because right now I can not handle any new fucking problems. I can not help to wonder why I can not just be normal in the sense that I can get pregnant, have a trouble free pregnancy, and a happy healthy baby? Nope, instead I am to watch everyone else get their dreams while I sit back and watch. It's like the universe is saying on big fuck you to me. I will not sit back and watch quietly, I will do everything in my power to be able to give the universe my middle finger back and say. HA! I fucking beat you. AAAAAAAAHH! Much better at least for now.